This year has been tough for many. It has had its ups and downs for us as a family. We have had people that we love pass away. We have had sickness on and off and 10 covid tests so far.
But today has had me with tears. We got an email from Alexander's preschool saying that Alexander's preschool photos are in. We got a photo album for each of the kids when they were at preschool of 6 photos taken of them. The album is beautifully presented and I love having them on display. Seeing that Alexander's photos are on the internet and we can order them from there and that we don't have an album for it just made me upset. It is something special that I wanted each of the kids to have. I don't know if the preschool changed the photographers because they couldn't rebook the regular ones that had to be cancelled earlier in the year because of Covid. It feels silly, but I loved picking up the little album from preschool, having the teachers comment on the photos and the joy of looking at the photos in the album, not online.
This then led to my mind thinking about the other things that Alexander has missed out on at Preschool this year. He has no clue what he has missed out on, but I know and it has made me sad. Things like the relationship with the teachers, that is lacking this year. We have had these teachers twice before and I have loved getting to know them, seeing them interact with the kids in the classroom, having quick chats with them at pick up and drop off about how their day has gone. I have loved seeing them care for Daniel and Eliza and I have missed seeing them care for Alexander (even though I know that they do care for him). I miss seeing the photos each day at pick up to see what Alexander has been doing. I am fortunate that Alexander enjoys talking about his day so I do still hear a lot of info about what he has been doing, but I would love to see the photos and feel a part of it.
I have missed going into preschool to help out at least once a year. I loved doing that with Eliza and Daniel and I was looking forward to helping in the classroom do a lesson for him and the class. I have missed seeing him paint a picture at the start of the day. I have missed seeing and helping him write his name. Even that has slipped as I noticed he now spells his name 'Alexamder' with an m. If I was in there I could help him realise this and help him correct it each morning.
I have missed the plays at the park with other families. Because of covid we have held off doing this because of numbers. It is so hard to know what is ok to do and what is not. If we do a play at the park, there could be every family there, or there could be just one other family. There is no way of knowing. Alexander is desperate to head to the park after preschool, and I have to keep saying no because I'm not prepared to go there when I pick him up.
I have missed getting to know the other kids in the preschool class. Alexander talks about kids and I only really know 2 of the kids by face. The others are just names. I have no clue of the parents in this class, and with being a class parent I feel bad that we haven't been able to make proper connections with the other parents. It has just been such a tricky year!
He missed out on orientation for next year because they only had new kids come into the preschool, as parents still aren't allowed on the grounds and also numbers would be too big.
Thinking of the end of the year, Alexander has missed out on the Christmas concert. He would have been so excited to perform at the concert. He was so very excited last year with the Mainly Music one. I wish he could do it. I wish I could watch him perform. He would just be so cute and so very sweet. I love the time with just him sitting at preschool, enjoying a bbq sausage and snacks and chatting. I am sad to miss that time. Party day is going to look different. Normally we can go in for the last half an hour to see them sing some songs, hear some words about the kids from Alison and then get gifts from the kids and give gifts to the teachers. It's not looking like this can happen this year. Even if they do it over zoom, it's just not the same. I want to get a photo of him with each of the teachers. I want to get a photo of him with some of his good mates. I want to give the teachers a hug to thank them for all they have done for each of our kids. I want to see them to speak with them, but it doesn't look like it will happen.
Don't get me wrong, the preschool has done an amazing job considering the circumstances and they have looked after the kids and the families so very well. I'm so grateful for the care that they still show to Alexander and for how much he has grown this year through preschool... I'm just sad that he is missing out on, and we are missing out on seeing, all the beautiful opportunities that the other kids had at this preschool. I would love for Covid to just go away...
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